


Mean Witches

by ShinyHokage



Series: Diakko: Movies Reimagined [1]
Category: Little Witch Academia
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Mean Girls Quotes, Teenage Drama, Useless Lesbians
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:28:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26803663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShinyHokage/pseuds/ShinyHokage
Summary: On October 3rd, Diana asked Akko what day it was.The retelling of Mean Girls in the LWA universe that you've all been waiting for.Because, honestly, Diana Cavendish as Regina George?Yes.
Relationships: Diana Cavendish/Atsuko "Akko" Kagari
Series: Diakko: Movies Reimagined [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1959778
Comments: 7
Kudos: 85





	Mean Witches

**Author's Note:**

> You can't convince me that Diana in the first movie wasn't a total Mean Witch.

**First Impressions Totally Don’t Matter, Right?**

“Ughhh,” Akko groaned. Usually her lunchtime source of entertainment, playing with the potato mush on her plate wasn’t enough to dissuade her complete _boredom_. “I thought Luna Nova was the exciting magic academy. When do I get to learn spells?” 

Amanda O’Neill raised an eyebrow from across the cafeteria table. It was Akko’s first week and Lotte and Sucy had already abandoned her. Something about studying for a more advanced magic class. Like Akko needed another reminder that she was already behind. But she couldn’t berate her friends completely, they had briefly introduced her to the green team before leaving and assured her that Amanda and Jasminka were chill – someone named Constanze was off building robots. Which, what? Did robots count as magic?

“School’s school, new girl. You gotta lower your expectations.” Amanda shrugged.

Akko glanced around the room, tables of three or more girls surrounded them. Pretty much everyone seemed to cling to their teammates. As if she hadn’t had enough of cliques in back in Japan. 

“I thought witches would be more exciting, like Chariot…”

For the first time that day, Amanda’s light green eyes lit up. “Exciting witches, you say? Oh we have that. You see the blue team over there? They’re the ‘pride’ of Luna Nova, the witchiest witches you’ll find. The ponytailed redhead is Hannah, the popularity try hard. Then there’s Barbara, the dumbest person you’ll ever meet-“

“She asked me how to spell orange once,” Jasminka Antonenko spoke up for the first time, fitting her words between mouthfuls of potato.

“Like I said, total airhead. And to top it all off there’s blondie queen Diana Cavendish… How do I even begin to explain Diana Cavendish?” Akko followed Amanda’s gaze to the table, and true to Amanda’s words, the three girls looked witchy. She recognized Hannah and Barbara as the girls that’d made fun of her at the ley line terminal before orientation. Figures. And Diana Cavendish, the girl who showed off in their first class. Totally witchy. 

Amanda must’ve seen the sour look on Akko’s face. “Want my advice? Avoid them. Keep your head down. It’s how the rest of us survive.”

First impressions aside, Akko considered herself an open and friendly girl. 

“They can’t be that bad,” Akko said.

Amanda leaned back dangerously far in her chair and folded her hands behind her head. “Don’t trust me? Find out for yourself. It’s your funeral.”

Akko also considered herself a competitive person. Besides, she’d survived years of flying practice, aka flinging herself down hills and off rooftops. What were three magic teenagers? With a confident smile and bounce of her half-ponytail, the ‘new girl’ – _rude, I have a name_ – rose and strode to the blue team table. 

Two pairs of eyes sized her up: hazel and teal. This Diana Cavendish didn’t give Akko a sideways glance and continued to read a book on dead witch languages as if nothing were happening. Probably meant to intimidate or drive Akko off, the action only further motivated her. She dropped her tray next to the blonde and sat down. 

The previous cacophony of conversations broke off and a hush settled over the room; all eyes were on their table. 

“Um, excuse you, what do you think you’re doing?” Hannah interrupted the silence first.

“This is, like, against the rules. You can’t sit with us.” Barbara added. Curious looks had been replaced with full-on hostility, but Akko sat her ground. 

She cleared her throat to push down any and all self-doubts; she was Akko Kagari, future Shiny Chariot! “Hi, I’m Akko. Let’s be friends!” 

A girl at the table behind them choked on her food, across the room Amanda O’Neill did a potato spit take, one of Hannah’s meticulously mascara’d eyes twitched. But Akko was focused on the blue-eyed girl next to her, the girl who finally chose to acknowledge the situation. 

“I don’t know what’s customary in the non-magic world but forcing your way into others’ space is considered rude behavior at Luna Nova.” 

Cold. Cold tone, cold gaze, cold composure; warning sirens blared in Akko’s head. Ok, maybe Amanda had been right, but it was far too late to back down now. No way. Akko’s mouth had opened and closed multiple times in the past minute without a sound coming out, but the moment words were came to her, Diana continued. 

“However, it would be remiss of me to not help a fellow student learn how to act.” 

And with that, Diana returned to her book. As if under a trance, the remainder of the cafeteria calmed at her words. As for Akko, she sighed in relief before a triumphant grin tugged at her lips. Across the table Hannah maintained her suspicious glare, but Barbara appeared to have accepted her at Diana’s succinct statement, and even took an interest in their table’s addition.

“So if you’re from the non-magic world, can you do magic?”

“Oh my god, Barbara, you can’t just ask people if they can do magic.” Hannah gaped at her friend before apologetically clasping Akko’s hand on the table. “But, like, can you?”

“You bet!”

_Cool girl voice: I’m in. Take that O’Neill, nobody is too witchy for me._

**In-Sync**

On October 3rd, Diana asked Akko what day it was. 

“Excuse me girls, but I appear to have misplaced my planner. Could you remind me of the date?” Over the past month, Akko had picked up on a thing or two. She was a super sleuth after all. First, Diana never let down her proper, perfect manner. Second, Barbara was a total romantic and sucker for the opposites attract trope. 

“It’s October 3rd,” Akko responded before the other two girls had time to react.

And it turned out Akko was too. 

The four of them were sitting on the grass in the courtyard, the statue that Diana had flawlessly animated towered behind them. Diana had insisted they study outside while the weather allowed for it, and she was right, today was a warm with scattered puffs of white floating above. A gentle breeze drifted from the botanical center, bringing with it lilac, rose, mint… peaceful smells.  
Normally Akko would’ve used this as an opportunity to goof off with the red and green teams, but ever since that day in the cafeteria, she’d found herself drawn to stay with blue. Team. Blue team. Not eyes. No, she definitely hadn’t whipped out her math notes in a guise to ‘study’ the one topic she excelled in and impress a particular popular witch.

And it definitely didn’t go according to a plan when Akko’s pencil tapping made Diana look at said notes and give Akko one of her rare, delicate smiles. Something so small and it filled the brunette with warmth. Everyone at Luna Nova revered Diana. Everyone vied for her attention. Everyone copied her where they could. And everyone looked where she looked. But Akko only cared about meeting one pair of eyes.

Platonically, obviously. Diana was just really cool. Everyone wanted Diana’s attention, why shouldn’t she?

“You’re a natural, Akko.” Oh man, a verbal compliment on top of a smile? Amanda was not gonna believe this. 

“Thanks! Yeah, I like math.” Wait, Diana was still looking at her. Crap, Akko liked math, but did she know how to form fancy sentences? What did Diana want her to say? She needed… she needed another hobby. Something to sweep the girl’s attention off its feet and hold it forever. “And… food.”

“Oh.”

That was not it. 

“Forget math, food is like, so fetch.” Hannah saved Akko from the awkward silence.

“Hannah dear, fetch is not a word.” Akko wanted Diana to call her dear… Wanted the months to go by faster so that their friendship was as close as Diana’s with the other two.

Their resident linguist waved Diana’s comment away and smirked mischievously. “Whatever, I have something far more fetch to discuss. Just hear me out Di, okay?” Barbara perked up from blowing on dandelions and exchanged a look with Hannah before the two reached into their backpacks and pulled out… pink sweaters. With white embroidered letters at the top of the sleeves: HE, BP, AK, and DC. “Obviously traditions are important, but Barbs and I thought what with our new member and all that we could start a new one. On Wednesdays we wear pink!”

“Oh wow, they’re so…” _Wait, I can’t say fetch after Diana shot it down. Positive descriptors… Mou, why are there so many English adjectives to remember?_ “Grool.” _No. No, no, no._ “Cool. I mean great. But also cool. Is what I meant.”

Diana, who had appeared ready to launch into a poignant explanation of why pink sweaters were inappropriate, smiled at the flustered expression on Akko’s face. “Grool,” she repeated. “I believe that’s fitting.”

Fitting, Akko’s ‘word’ was _fitting_. Akko pulled the AK sweater over her head to hide her satisfied blush. 

“Wow Akko, pink suits you!” Hannah scooted over to her side and reached out to mess with Akko’s hair before the brunette could protest. After a few scuffled minutes, her dark brown hair, previously held up by a hair-tie, spilled around her head in messy layers. Messy layers that were also quickly adjusted by her unasked for stylist; Hannah meticulously swept Akko’s hair away from her face with her finger. After somehow even more scuffled and complaint-filled minutes, Hannah crossed her arms and sat back to admire her work. “Your hair looks so sexy let down. Diana, will you please tell Akko her hair looks sexy let down?”

Akko’s blush returned at those words. Diana, calling her hair sexy? No, that couldn’t happen, could it? But it was natural to want her to, right, yeah, anyone would want that kind of compliment. And Hannah said it first, it didn’t mean anything. Maybe for Europeans sexy was just another word for pretty. 

Diana bit her lip – in concentration, duh – and absorbed every detail with her eyes.

“Mhm.”

Akko’s stomach somersaulted like an Olympic gymnast and she vowed to never put her hair up or take this sweater off. 

**Pick A Side, Witch**

“So, Akko, you’re pretty chummy with the blue team these days. I’m shocked Diana let you leave her shadow to talk to us.” Amanda was the last to hop off her broom and onto the field. It was one of ‘these days’ where the full red and green teams were together again in, wow had it been months? A quick red versus green relay around the track had made almost everyone forget that fact. Apparently almost didn’t include Amanda.

“I’m allowed to have other friends,” Akko shot back, more against her own twinge of guilt than Amanda’s words. “And I’m not in anyone’s shadow. Diana doesn’t look down on people like that.”

“Everyone except Constanze looks down at you,” Amanda smirked before her serious tone regained its hold. “I’m telling you, Akko, she’s bad news. You can’t have more than one friend group when it comes to them. I mean you’re not even allowed to have your old hairstyle or own clothes anymore.”

Dirt could be really interesting, especially the patch that Akko swept absentmindedly with her broom. Amanda had no idea what she was talking about. None of them did. _It’s not my fault I’m the only one bold enough to make new friends._

Amanda smacked Akko’s broom away with her own. “Seriously?” _Oh, I said that out loud._ “It is absolutely your fault you’re the only one stupid enough to be her friend.”

“You don’t know Diana like I do!”

Jasminka tapped Akko on the shoulder and shook her head. “Amanda used to be part of their group,” she whispered. Loudly. Enough that Amanda’s scowl only deepened.

“Getting out was the best decision of my life.”

“Is that so?” All six girls swiveled at the sound of Diana’s voice. Hand on her hip, head held high, Akko drank it in, sure that none of her other friends could pull that off. “I seem to recall you ran away.” 

Light blue eyes focused on Akko; with that same slight smile she’d spent weeks coaxing out of Diana. Instead of studying. It was important to make your friends smile more. “Come along Akko, we’re going to the library.”

Amanda snorted. “What is she, your lost puppy?”

“Must you antagonize, O’Neill?” Diana’s smile disappeared in a moment, replaced by an icy fury. “I simply wish for Akko to spend time with her friends.”

“Wow, Cavendish, I didn’t know friendship was in your vocabulary. We’re her friends. Not that Akko’s smart enough to realize it.”

Akko did _not_ like where this was going. “Guys…”

“How dare you drag Akko into what is clearly a resentment you hold against me.”

“Oh, right, I almost forgot! Everything’s about you and my obvious big _lesbian_ crush on you! That is what you told everyone, isn’t it?” Amanda and Diana bristled at each other, a moment that could turn into a more than verbal fight at the drop of a hat. A moment that could only be broken by an idiotic response.

Akko choked on thin air. “L-lesbian?”

“Yes, Akko, lesbian. But you two would know all about that.” And with that bombshell dropped, Amanda threw her arms up in the air and marched away. “Suck on _that_!”

Wowee, dirt really was interesting. Yup, Akko decided that she hadn’t finished her sweeping before. 

“Akko,” Barbara bent over and forced her face into view. “Are you, you know?” Her silky voice became barely audible. “A friend of the nine olde witches?”

“What?”

“Lesbian,” Hannah cut in. “She means are you a lesbian?” 

Barbara tapped her forehead with a finger. “I can tell, you know. It’s like I have L-ESPN or something.”

“That’s not a thing, but…” Hannah trailed off her chastisement and turned to Akko.

They were waiting for Akko to respond. Akko had no idea how to respond. It was ridiculous, what kind of question, how could they, this was not, she was not prepared. But then again, she rarely was, and her quick thinking always got her out of sticky situations. Yeah, all she had to do was come up with a genius cover. 

Akko let all the air out of her lungs in her best impression of a nonchalant huff. “Whaaat? Of course not! I have a crush on… on… Andrew!”

Hannah made a sound not unlike a cat about to throw up and Barbara lowered the first she had been trying to fit into her mouth for the tenth time that week; she swore she could do it. Worst of all,  
Diana’s furious gaze reserved for O’Neill tore into Akko.

“Hanbridge? I see. In that case, I have duties to attend to.” The blonde smoothed her unwrinkled skirt and walked, no, stomped away. Akko had never seen Diana stomp before, and she would be lying to herself if she didn’t admit it terrified her. 

“What just happened?”

“You’re dead,” Barbara said flatly.

“ _Eh_?”

“Andrew’s like Diana’s ex or something. Nobody really knows, but the way they act around each other there had to be a dramatic fallout,” Hannah clarified. “You don’t date a friend’s ex, that’s like rule number one of witch code.”

“I-I didn’t know,” Akko stuttered. _Her ex? I used her ex as an excuse? Mou, what’s wrong with me? I don’t even actually like Andrew like that!_ “She… I can just not like Andrew anymore! Diana’ll forgive me, right?”

Hannah and Barbara exchanged a glance and looked back at Akko like she were already lying in an open casket.

“Right…?”

**Sweet Tooth for You**

“Candy broom grams! Get your candy grams before they run out! Guaranteed to spark magic between you and your sweetheart this Holiday!” Wangari called from the head of the line of girls lined up down the hall outside their dorm room. For just one pound, the yellow team would send miniature brooms and notes to girls’ friends, or crushes, at the end of the day’s classes. How the three of them sorted all the dozens of requests in such short time escaped Akko.

The red team girls were finally second in line. After almost an hour of waiting. Akko swore half the students in the hall were fake, there couldn’t be so many people she didn’t know. Especially since… well, after the Andrew incident Diana, and subsequently the blue team, had given her the cold shoulder. And Amanda. So she’d been expanding her horizons! Nope, no platonic breakups would get Akko down. 

Lotte nudged Akko with her elbow. “Who are you buying one for?”

“Maybe Diana will forgive you if you smother her in candy grams,” Sucy snickered. “Or another type of smothering.”

“That’s not my plan!” Akko pouted. It totally was her plan – the first part! One time, she had confided in her roommates one time about how brokenhearted their falling out had been. One time! And Sucy refused to stop teasing her. A girl more intellectually in tune with her feelings would pick up on why the teasing stung, but Akko was not yet that girl. “Diana probably gets tons anyway…”

“I’m sure she’d still appreciate it Akko. Barbara told me she was really upset about you liking Andrew inst- about what happened.” The pink team stepped away from Wangari’s table and Lotte shoved Akko forward. “Your heart’s in the right place, believe in it!”

A wave of relief washed over Akko. Diana was upset too! Was it selfish to be happy about that? But then, maybe it meant there was hope. Not that the Diana fiasco was the only one occupying Akko’s mind. 

“Kagari! Have you been holding out on us?” Wangari beamed from her position perched on the edge of the table, microphone in han- wait, were they filming this? Talk about anonymity. “Word around Luna Nova is you’ve got an Appleton beau.”

“What’s with the cameras?” Akko asked.

“Finally, someone asks instead of shyly looking away! We at the Luna Nova News Network care about the success of our peers, in every sense. We’ve got exposes on academics, sports, and… love. Who doesn’t want to watch true love bloom?” She blocked Akko’s nervous sidestep with an arm. “With their permission, of course!”

“Oh, ok… can I get two candy grams?”

“You know it! That’ll be…” Wangari glanced at the pricing list and blanched. “Fifty pounds.”

“Fifty- what? But I just watched the pink team get them for a pound each!”

“It appears there’s been a last-minute change for, uh, special customers.” The dejected look on Akko’s face increased the reporter’s discomfort. “Listen, I’m sorry Akko but… I can’t go against her wishes.”

_Her?_

Sucy flicked the side of Akko’s head. “Looks like Diana’s broom-blocking you Akko.”

“What? Because of Andrew? But I’m not even- whatever.” Akko fished her savings our of her pocket, forty-nine pounds, and slapped it onto the table before she scribbled names on two candy grams. “Sue me for the last pound.”

Lotte paid a dollar for hers, a friendly gift to her fellow Night Fall fan. At least someone on the red team still had ties to blue, even if it was a secret Luna Nova fan club. Man, Akko missed Hannah teasing Barbara…

Someone like Diana Cavendish would shove these thoughts to the back of her head as the first class of Valentine’s Day began; Akko chose to mope. Seating, since when had seating arrangements become such an integral part of Akko’s day? Diana sat within Akko’s line of sight in every single class. Hours passed, filled with long-winded lectures, exploding potions, failed transfigurations, star charts predicting that Akko would die alone, ok that last one was an exaggeration, but it sure felt like it to her. Akko’s habit of tapping her pen against her notebook escalated as her moment of truth approached. 

The door to astrology class slammed open and Jasminka stood at the entrance, decked out in some half reindeer half elf costume. But all eyes were on the bag over her shoulder.  
Ursula dropped her wand at the interruption and adjusted her glasses in a failed attempt to hide her surprise. “I-I suppose that concludes class for today. I’m sure you’re all very excited for break!” 

Right, for break.

That was Jasminka’s cue, the reindeer-elf swung her bag onto the professor’s table and dozens of candy brooms spilled out. The green team witch scooped four of them up and waved them in front of her as she approached the desks. 

“FOUR for you Diana Cavendish! You GO Diana Cavendish.” The blonde threw them a dejected glance before returning to her notes. 

Akko bit the inside of her cheek, that was not part of the plan. But it was okay! There was still time. Barbara sent Lotta a candy gram in return, Amanda received one and stuck her tongue out at Akko, progress in the first time the rebel had looked at Akko at least, Sucy’s candy gram had a drawing of a mushroom as the sender (?) and Akko…

“And none for you Akko Kagari!” Jasminka scooped the final candy gram into her bag, which was blatantly suspicious. 

“Wait, what about-“ Akko was cut off by a rage-infused laugh. 

Diana stood up; candy gram crushed in her balled fist. White and red dust spilled between her fingers and Akko was left with a distinct image of the gesture being meant to represent crushing her. 

The infuriated witch held her fist out in Akko’s direction, all semblance of her normal composure gone. “What is the meaning of this? Do you think me a fool?” 

“No, of course not!” It was now or never. Akko scrambled to her feet and approached the blue team table. “I think you’re the smartest girl I’ve ever met.” A step forward. “And the prettiest.” Second step.  
“And the most amazing.” Face to face at last, the way a conversation was meant to go. Akko’s words were doing their job, the fury from Diana’s gaze lessened with each word, and Akko was ready to bring it home. “And I’m sorry I hurt a friend like you, I know you and Andrew were close so I shouldn’t have said that about him. I didn’t really mean it anyways, I promise.”

 _Crash_. The sound of shattered glass failed to break their eye contact. 

“Friend? Kagari, may you take that fraudulent apology, and choke on-“

And that was when the broom bus from the fall play slammed straight into Diana Cavendish. Knocked out, she slumped into a very bewildered Akko’s arms, which on its own would’ve been enough to cause a panic. 

“She pushed her into it!” A rando shouted. 

There it was, the last straw for full-blown classroom panic. Full-blown, Hannah was right about Akko dying, panic as a wave of hostility washed toward Akko. But she didn’t push Diana! Akko would never hut someone she… cared about, even with broom-blocking and losing all her money and now probably getting murdered. Ack, it all would’ve been worth it, if only her friendship-mending plan had worked. 

“Students, please, we must get Miss Cavendish to the nurse’s office!” The voice of reason saved Akko. Ursula rushed to her side and muttered a levitation spell; and naysayers be shiny arc’d, Akko wasn’t gonna leave Diana’s side until she was okay again. 

“Boo, you-“

Akko and Ursula didn’t wait for the rando to finish her sentence.

**Personally Victimized**

“I knew your antics would wind up with a dead body one day,” the nurse grumbled as Luna Nova’s reckless professor-student duo strode in. What was meant as a sarcastic comment turned to a gasp when the nurse noticed who it was. “Diana! I can’t believe you’ve done this.”

“It wasn’t my fault!” Akko protest fell on deaf ears. 

Akko accepted that social norms had their place in some situations, and this was one of them. She shuffled aside as the nurse and Ursula tenderly laid Diana on a cot and the former began a series of healing incantations. The latter approached Akko. 

“I’m no expert in rivalries,” she lied through her teeth, “but I think you and Diana need to talk about this before it escalates further.”

Akko frowned at her rival’s limp body, just across the small room, hurt because Akko had distracted her. “I just tried that! She won’t listen to me.”

Ursula sighed. “Alright, why don’t you try this? Listen to what she has to say first, show her that you care about her friendship more than justifying what happened.” _She doesn’t need to emphasize friendship like that, I know what I lost!_

The nurse finished her incantations and turned from the cot to chastise the Japanese witch, but Ursula moved between them. “May I have a word with you in the hall?” _Subtle, sensei._ But Ursula was a professor after all, and the nurse followed her outside. Even more subtle, Ursula shut it behind them. 

Diana groaned and rubbed the back of her head as she blinked awake. On the other side of the room, Akko realized this was one of the few times they’d been alone together; the blue team trio spent every day together. Even when they’d been a brief quad, Akko hadn’t had time to… Diana always had a flock of witches vying for her attention. And this was absolutely the first time she’d seen Diana’s face relaxed, peaceful. Was it mean of her to wish her ex-friend had stayed unconscious a little longer? 

The groan shifted from dazed to frustrated as Diana noticed Akko. “I find it difficult to believe that you healed me.”

“N-no,” Akko admitted. “But I wanted to stay until you woke up.” The friendly sentiment crumbled under Diana’s gaze. _You know what, maybe it was better when Diana didn’t talk to or look at me…_ “And you’re awake! So…” Her feet refused to move. 

The glare remained, but the after-effects of the healing spells left it unfocused. 

“Why?” Diana asked. 

“Eh?”

“Why did you lie about Andrew?”

“I don’t know…” Evidently not the answer Diana was looking for. She rose to her feet too quickly and stumbled forward. Andrew aside, what Akko did know was that she didn’t want Diana to get hurt any further. Akko’s planted feet broke free, hands moved on instinct to steady Diana. _Vulnerable. She looks vulnerable and I… I want to be worth her walls coming down. I want to make her smile. I want to protect her._

Pale hands slapped Akko’s away. “Have I not made it clear that I don’t wish for your protection? Or attention? Or anything to do with you? Your obsession with me, initially endearing, has become rather detestable.”

Akko crossed her arms and gave the stubborn witch a dirty look. “Mou! What do you want from me, Diana? All I did was say I liked Andrew. Yeah, it was a mistake and I said I was sorry about pretending to like your ex. You’re the one who obsessed over it and blew it out of proportion! If you want him, you can have him. Whatever. But who breaks up a friendship over something so stupid?!”

“I don’t want Andrew,” Diana spat out each syllable of his name as if she hated him. Which made zero sense to Akko.

“So then what’s your _problem _?”__

__Diana sighed in exasperation. “At this moment it’s your insistence on continuing a conversation I clearly don’t want to participate in. Otherwise, your hypocrisy is equally distasteful. You say you want to apologize, to repair our friendship, but this is the first I’ve heard of it since that day. Not once did you attempt to apologize in person before sending a candy broom to do it for you.”_ _

__“You avoided me every time I tried!”_ _

__“Be that as it may, friendship requires dedication.” Diana frowned as Akko blocked her exit, back pressed against the door and arms held out to the sides. “Please move so that I may leave.”_ _

__Akko shook her head. “Nope, this is me being dedicated. You’re not going anywhere until we fix this!”_ _

__Diana may have been witch extraordinaire, but Akko had a lifetime of school-yard brawls under her belt. Without the wand currently in Ursula’s possession, _thank you for your forgetful kleptomania sensei_ , Diana had no choice but to stoop to Akko’s level. Diana reached for the doorknob, and Akko smacked her hand away. Diana tried to peel Akko off, and Akko slumped to the floor. Diana tried to drag her away, and Akko kicked Diana’s legs out from under her. A movie-worthy move that the brunette instantly regretted when she became her ‘obsession’s cushion. One of those miniature couch cushions, totally not equipped for accidental body slams. _ _

__“Oof,” Akko wheezed._ _

__“Akko!” A hint of concern burst through Diana’s cold-hearted façade._ _

__“Gotcha,” Akko coughed smugly._ _

__Sure her comment brought back Diana’s scowl, but the jig was up because now Akko knew there was a chance. She grabbed a fistful of Diana’s shirt to stop her from getting off and stomping away again.  
Too much progress was being made. “Gotcha,” she repeated. “I’m not letting go until you say we’re friends again.”_ _

__“Nine olde witches, Akko, you are so stupid.”_ _

__Akko beamed at what she registered as a compliment and sat up, still holding onto Diana’s shirt so they’d be face to face. Close enough that Akko could see the furious walls crumbling beyond those sky-blue eyes. Those pretty… beautiful… alluring… when did Akko learn the word alluring?_ _

__“And you’re so smart! It’s perfect.”_ _

__Diana flushed at the praise and turned her face away, alluring eyes no longer meeting Akko’s. “I wanted it to be me.”_ _

__“What?”_ _

__“When you said Andrew. I wanted it to be me.”_ _

___Diana wanted to be the one to say that she liked Andrew? No, that didn’t make sense. Diana wanted Akko to…?_ _ _

__Akko’s eyes squinted in concentration then shot open. “Oh. Oh?! OH!”_ _

__Despite that obvious breach in verbal etiquette, Diana turned back and stared at Akko silently. Which Akko was grateful for; there was a lot for her to think about. Obviously she’d already admitted Diana was the smartest and most beautiful, wait had she said beautiful or pretty before? Whatever, the most beautiful and graceful and motivated and ambitious and had the warmest smiles and letting go of her was out of the question and she was so warm Akko wanted to pull her closer and…_ _

__“Oh.”_ _

__“Oh?” Diana prodded._ _

__“I’m not obsessed with you, I think I’m...”_ _

__“Yes?”_ _

__“I’m in love with…”_ _

__“Mhm?” Diana purred._ _

___Showtime._ _ _

__“Do you subscribe to L-ESPN?”_ _

__Diana’s lips pursed together and her mental construction Cavendishes went back to work building up her walls, just as Akko planned. What was a confession worth without dramatic buildup?_ _

__“You look constipated,” Akko giggled. “But that’s ok, I still love you.”_ _

__“Akko! I cannot believe- mmph-“ Akko leaned up and kissed Diana, smothering the remainder of the blonde’s words. She finally let go of Diana’s shirt to wrap her arms around her waist and pulled her rival as close as physically possible. The feeling of Diana’s fingers running through her hair sent shivers down Akko’s spine and she failed to suppress another giggle as Diana tilted forward and delicately pinned Akko to the floor. For all Akko cared, Diana could’ve body slammed her again. The memory of clutching Diana’s shirt returned, and Akko’s hands brushed over the white silk, moved from her lower back, up her stomach, rubbed the buttons._ _

__Diana lifted her lips from Akko, who valiantly fought to follow her forward until Diana placed one of her smooth fingers on Akko’s mouth and pushed her down. The blonde hung above her momentarily and smiled. Not a gentle smile, but the fullest, least composed smile Akko had ever seen._ _

__“I’m not obsessed with you too… Now, I believe our _friendship_ has lost time to make up for.” _ _

__A smile Akko mirrored as Diana finally forgave her._ _

___How could Akko even begin to explain Diana Cavendish?_ _ _

___The girl who personally victimized and stole her heart._ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> Did I spend my Saturday writing this? Yes. Do I regret it? No. Is there a vine reference along with the Mean Girls quotes? Also yes.
> 
> Sorry Barbara, someone had to be Karen.


End file.
